In performance, any musician can experience performance anxiety. It can manifest itself in many uncomfortable ways. We might get a dry mouth or perspire heavily. Our bodies may become tense, and we may feel unable to play our instruments the way we practiced. I want to share a strategy to overcome performance anxiety that has been very beneficial to me.
The problem with narrowing our focus
Sometimes, we musicians try to improve our performance by narrowing our focus, figuring that if we could just get rid of all the distractions, we can crowd out anything that might get in the way of our performance. If performance anxiety is one of the “distractions,” we may think we can crowd out the fear we feel by trying to ignore it. But by trying to pretend it’s not there, the anxiety can grow and overtake us.
I believe, on the contrary, that one of the best ways to manage performance anxiety is by not trying to exclude aspects of your experience from your awareness, but by actively trying to include everything. I am a teacher of a somatic discipline called Body Mapping, through which I have learned and relied on a practice we call Inclusive Awareness. Inclusive Awareness means opening your awareness to include your whole self, including all your thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations, as well as to everything in the world around you—the space you are performing in, and everyone in the space with you, including fellow performers and the audience.
Inclusive Awareness means that you open your awareness in the inward and outward directions at the same time. When you work on expanding your awareness in this way, it becomes possible that your awareness can include your anxiety and everything else. The fear becomes just one more thing in your awareness. It no longer has to feel overwhelming.
Practice opening your awareness in your practice room and in the rehearsal studio so you can use this awareness when you are performing. Practice walking onto the stage with your head balanced on your spine and look at the entire room. Feel the movement in all your joints. Notice the sounds in the room, as well as sounds coming from outside of the room. Feel the support of the floor or the chair. When playing while reading music, open your awareness to include more than just the notes on the page.
My story
A few years ago, I was privileged to perform a solo with the St. Louis Symphony. I walked onto the stage, acknowledged the audience, smiled, and took my place. The performance started well, but almost immediately I felt a bit of vertigo. Perhaps this was because I was standing near the edge of the stage, which had a dropoff of several feet; it could have been made worse by some performance anxiety I felt. As I played, I recalled my training in Inclusive Awareness and remembered to open my awareness to include everyone in the audience, all of my colleagues on the stage, the temperature of the air on my skin, the quality of light—every sensory possibility that was available to me at that moment. I acknowledged my feeling of anxiety. I re-established my connection with the floor by feeling my weight being delivered to the stage floor through my feet. Immediately, the vertigo diminished as I recruited my whole self to participate in my performance. I believe that my performance was rescued by my reliance on Inclusive Awareness.
We musicians take on a big responsibility when we step onto the stage. Our audience has come to hear us, hoping to be uplifted. The stress of this responsibility can bring on performance anxiety. However, including our whole selves and our whole environment in our awareness can relieve that anxiety, opening the possibility of joyful music-making.
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